Children love a good hero story. Sometimes, hero stories start with an unfortunate event, and sometimes, they have very ordinary beginnings. Yet all heroes, like all children, encounter some measure of adversity in life.

The impact of hardship on kids’ lives is often unpredictable. Many youth overcome a problematic home life to find a healthy and hopeful path.

Others internalize their anger and struggle with their sense of value. One child responds to difficulties with determination; another will despair and drift aimlessly.

Why do some harness hardship and others flounder? How can parents, teachers, stakeholders, and caregivers assist kids facing difficulties and challenges?  How can they foster emotional resilience in children?

Suppose every child is to be the hero of their own story. This article will explore ways to help them withstand challenges, create emotional resilience, and follow their desired path.

Seeking Support Structures

Resilience is the ability to withstand or recover from hardship and stress—to bounce back.

Research suggests that resilience is not an individual trait but rather is influenced by a complex interplay of factors in the community.

It’s an attribute developed within family, social, and cultural contexts. Examples of resilience tools built within the child’s community include close relationships, a sense of belonging, family management, beliefs in system efficacy, problem-solving, and optimism.

Some hero stories include magical objects or superpowers. Resilience tools are like those wonderful items and are given to children—they don’t develop them alone. As adults who want to help kids grow through and beyond adversity, we can help them find support structures that develop these characteristics—the magical shield for their story.

Some children benefit from techniques that help calm a riot of emotions. Others may need help making up for academic or material setbacks.

Some need help seeing their value and the value of the world around them. All children will need help finding a path through an occasionally chaotic world. Individuals are different, so support structures will differ; caregivers and guardians can help kids discover the right resilience tools.

Finding mentors

Youth, much like our heroes, need wise mentors. Without the mentor, the hero never gets to wave her lightsaber or gain the knowledge and understanding of her own strengths.

Harvards’s Center on the Developing Child reports, “The most common factor for emotional resilience in children is at least one stable and committed relationship with a supportive parent, caregiver, or other adult.”

There are families with positive role models securely in place and families who experience a lack of stability.

The need is urgent for kids who lack the solidity of a strong family. Fortunately, any adult willing to build a relationship intentionally can help these students develop resilience.

The influence of mentors is significant in countering the challenges posed by poverty, upheaval, and difficult circumstances. Like in classic hero stories, a trusted mentor or guiding figure can effectively help them become resilient. Resources invested in providing mentors will not be ill-spent.

The Ability to Move Forward

With mentors and support structures in place to help them navigate internal and external challenges, kids have a greater ability to ‘bounce back’ or move forward in adversity by taking healthy and appropriate risks, confronting problems, and learning from failures.

Many storybook heroes succeed as they, with the counsel of their wise sage, face up to their challenges. kids can also move beyond their problems with community support and mentors who employ helpful strategies for fostering resilience. These include:

• Allowing children to experience and work through discomfort independently.
  • Building strong emotional connections with them.
  • Promoting healthy risk-taking.
  • Teaching problem-solving skills.

Parents and caregivers are advised to resist solving problems directly. Instead, they might ask questions that lead children to find solutions.

Emotion labeling and demonstrating coping skills, like deep breathing, are also important. Experts stress the value of embracing mistakes and promoting optimism, as well as the benefits of outdoor activities and exercise in building resilience.

What is essential is active support from the community to help guide young people through challenges and teach them resilience for dealing with life’s inevitable stresses and setbacks.

Organizations seeking to provide youth with emotional training, material support, and, most importantly, mentors matter. The support of our schools, counselors, clubs, and teams matters.

The involvement of parents, guardians, grandparents, and neighbors matters. Faith-based organizations and cultural institutions matter. These community pillars are building much-needed resilience in our young heroes.

About TLC

The Lincoln Center for Family and Youth (TLC) is a social enterprise company serving the Greater Philadelphia Area.

Among its six divisions, TLC offers School-based Staffing Solutions, Mobile Coaching and Counseling, and Heather’s Hope: A Center for Victims of Crime.

These major programs are united under TLC’s mission to promote positive choices and cultivate meaningful connections through education, counseling, coaching, and consulting.

For more information visit www.TheLincolnCenter.com