By: Elizabeth Billies

Did January feel like the longest month ever? It did for me. The days drag on, and the weeks feel endless. I have seen many articles referring to January as “Divorce Month.” A “National Divorce Day” is even designated on the first Monday in January.

Here are three reasons why people may think January is divorce month:

1. Holiday stress exacerbates issues that are already present in the marriage.

2. People see January as a time to start fresh, which includes separating from their spouses.

3. The cost of the holidays can reveal significant issues about a couple’s finances.

Holiday Stress Exacerbates Issues That Are Already Present in the Marriage

Are the holidays really “the most wonderful time of the year?” Not always. It is no secret that the holidays, while often enjoyable, can also be super stressful. Spending money, juggling family members and obligations, and getting those last-minute gifts can just mean a lot of stress for everyone. Oh, and Aunt Marge is coming to stay, too? Yikes.

Being able to handle these stressful times as a couple is crucial. They don’t say for better or worse in traditional marriage vows for no reason. For example, were you already feeling unsupported by your spouse before they dropped the ball when his or her parents came to town? Did your spouse embarrass you at the family Christmas dinner one time too many?

These incidents, by themselves, may not be much. Most people don’t get divorced because their spouse forgot to pick up the can of green beans that you asked for (even if it was the twentieth time you asked). But unfortunately, these difficult moments can reveal when a couple is not on the same page. They can also be the last straw in an ever-growing pile of straws.

So, it makes sense that January, the month after the holidays, would be the time when a person would want to initiate divorce. However, make sure that doing so is not just a gut reaction to something that happened during December. Ask yourself, “Was this incident an example of a problem? Will I still be mad about this in March?”

If the answer to the second question is “no” or “I’m not sure,” take a breath and wait to see if filing for divorce during “divorce month” is the right move for you. According to a 15-year study conducted by the University of Washington in Washington State, March and August are the months with the most divorce filings. So, maybe people are actually taking this advice!

People See January as a Time to Start Fresh, Which Includes Separating From Their Spouses

While it may be a dreary month weather-wise, January can be considered the most beautiful month of the year. You may be saying, what — really? It’s cold, and there are no presents!

While the weather is less than ideal, January symbolizes our evergreen ability to start fresh. I love that we get a chance to start over every year. It’s a clean slate with endless possibilities. We all know that January is the month of new resolutions. Losing weight, reading more, and going to bed earlier are all common January goals. Should we add getting divorced to the list?

For some, starting over means getting divorced. By filing for divorce in January, a person is saying I want to start this year new. I want it to be different than last year. This is my year to get it right and live the life I want.

I see how tempting this is. But again, while January is a month of fresh starts, you have every day to “get it right” and start again. So, don’t feel like you need to be on a specific timeline because of what the calendar says. Every month can be divorce month if it is the right move for you.

The Cost of the Holidays Can Reveal More Significant Issues About a Couple’s Finances

Money, by itself, may not be the top reason that couples get divorced. However, how spouses communicate about and handle money issues can reveal larger problems in their union. And what is more expensive than the holidays?

Gift-giving, traveling, holiday parties, oh my. These expenses can certainly add up. If you and your spouse are not on the same page regarding your finances, these large expenditures can reveal major issues in your communication styles and life goals.

Therefore, these disagreements may cause you to question whether you and your partner are on the same page regarding your future. And, it is that reason, and not necessarily the cost of the Thanksgiving turkey, that can cause January to become divorce month.

So, is January really divorce month?

Historically, I’ve seen an uptick in work during January because existing clients, who may have put their divorce on hold for the holidays, return ready to finish the divorce process. But I have definitely had more calls for new cases this past month than the last few. So, for that reason, I will endorse January as “divorce month.”

If you are contemplating a divorce, remember there is no right or wrong time to file unless it is right or wrong for you. So don’t let a date on a calendar influence your decision to end your marriage. Deciding to file for divorce or even to see a divorce lawyer for an initial consultation is a big step. Make sure you make this move only when you feel fully informed and emotionally ready.

If you need assistance with a family law matter or wish to learn more about the divorce process call 215.362.2474 or send an email. 

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Elizabeth J. Billies, Partner

Liz practices all areas of family law, including but not limited to, preparing pre-and post-nuptial agreements, obtaining no-fault and fault divorces, as well as litigating and settling equitable distribution, custody, and support matters.

Her clients value her collaborative and cost-effective approach to legal representation. Liz strives to resolve all matters expeditiously and efficiently while maintaining a high level of compassion and attention to detail.

If you have a divorce or family law question, please contact a member of our team or call 215.362.2474.